How to Kiss A Girl 101
by Blaze2Sage
Summary: [Complete] The Konoha boys picked up an interesting book. How will it end? Will it end with a slap or a reward?[NaruHina][SasuSaku][ShikaIno][NejiTen] Warning: OOC
1. Neji's Slap

Dedication: Reviewers from my other story, Stolen Kiss.

Story Status: Chapter One/One Shot

Pairings: Neji/Tenten

Summary: Neji comes upon a book. Interested, he decided to test it out. I wonder if it goes well…

**How to Kiss A Girl 101**

"Hinata-sama what is this?" A young silver eyed boy said. He was looking furious while holding a book in his hand and shaking his fist on the other

" N-n-neji-n-ni-nii-s-san…I…I'm…j-just h-ho-holding it fo-for Sak-saku-sakura-chan," She trembled in his sight. His look did not change

"You are far too young to read this Hinata-sama," He said plainly. He turns and read the title and his left eyebrow made an arch

"How to Kiss A Girl 101?" Hinata slowly nodded

"I-it wa-was a p-pr-present f-for Sa-sasuke," He ignored her as he read the first page

_Do you want to get the girl of your dreams? Or you just plain scared to get her? Hahaha…what kind of weakling are you? Have you even kissed a girl? Pathetic! Well do not fret since this guide will help you get the girl you want!_

"Hn…" "Neji-nii-san?" "Huh?" He turns to Hinata who had a worry look in her face

"Ah, I'll dispose of this," He gave out a final glare to Hinata who was stiff but nodded slowly

"Hai…" He exited the house and starts reading the first page

_Step one: Find a girl you like. Someone hot, someone nice, and someone strong. Make sure she is single! The other guide has been caused some few troubles in many relationship and injuries had been occur. She has to be worthy of your kiss. Remember a girl may slap you if you do not do this delicately _

He snorted. Yeah right as if anyone will slap him but it got him thinking of a particular person

_"PERVERT!" _

**_SLAP_**

He winced as he imagined what would've happen if he done it like **that.** Slowly, he turned the next page

_Step two: Did you find a girl you like? Good! Also make sure she likes you. Remember from the first step that she might slap you and we do not want that to happen now do we? _

He gave out a grin. The book was actually amusing to him.

"Hmm…" He imagined once again. Did she like him? Sure she had been with him forever and she had stood by his side but does it mean she like him?

_"Neji…I'm in love with you," _

"Nah, she isn't like that," he muttered to himself but had a sly grin on his face. It would be nice for her to say that, he shook his head furiously as he went on the next step

_Step three: Ok you're not sure she likes you. Well just take a risk! I mean what harm can that do? This guide is not responsible for your death, injury, or pain in any way and by pain we mean your sacred place _

"This guide is stupid. A waste of money…" he muttered to himself once again. He stopped walking and actually sat down and read the guide despite himself saying it was stupid

_Step four: Hold her closely and deeply look into her eyes. Girls dig that! Slowly say you love her or that you want your first kiss to be hers. It does not matter wherever you are but the recommended place would be in the meadows where they'll be no one around_

"Interesting…" A meadow? How about a training ground? He shrugged to himself that can work but quickly shook it off realizing what he just thought

_Step Five: Kiss her. Oh but do it with your eyes open. It's rude to kiss while not looking at her and maybe slide your hands on her legs Wink, Wink _

He gave out a perverted grin but shook it and then frowned

_Step Six: Repeat step five if necessary and if you want to go further than that. Purchase our book, "How to Fu-_

Ok that's enough. He had enough. He threw the book on the ground and went to the training ground where he met Tenten

"Neji-kun! You're late! That's a first," She gave out a chuckle

"Hn," He remembered the first step

_'Must be worthy of my kiss,'_

"Ready for a spar?" Tenten stood in her stance already but Neji shook his head no

"Huh? What's wrong with you Neji?"

Then he remembered the second step

"Tenten…" "Hai Neji-kun?" She stood normally with a puzzled face. He gave out a grin and took a step towards her while she was beginning to sweat

_'Make sure she likes you…' as he clearly remembered  
__  
_"Tenten…" He repeated once more as she was backed on the tree and he was hovering over her

"Do you like me?" "Nani!" She screamed out while Neji winced

'_Not a good sign,' _

"Yes or no?"

"Of course I like you," Neji gave out a look but she quickly said

"I admire you. You're always so great and strong. I wish to be like you so hai,"

He gave out a chuckle as his hand was on the tree. He quickly skip step three and went on to step four. He was looking deeply into her eyes and his other hand held her waist

'_Hold her closely and deeply look into her eyes,' he mentally thought _

"Last step," He whisper to himself as he leans to Tenten

"N-n-nej-" but she was cut off as his soft lips went upon hers. He deepens the kiss but not realizing he puts his hand on her thighs. Tenten widen her eyes and broke it off while screamed

"PERVERT!"

**SMACK**

Ouch!

"…" said Neji. Tenten gave out a glare at him but he took out a crazy smile and Tenten giggled. Giggle?

"Neji…" He stood up and did the same technique again and this time he tried step five again and again (Without the leg thing). Heh.

_'I guess that guide is good for something. I might purchase the sequel,' he thought with a pervert grin as he keeps kissing the girl he loves_

**The End**

I am not completely sure if this story was taken. If it is, I apologize and I'll take it down. Ok it was way OOC wasn't it? Well I wanted other characters but it wouldn't make sense. Naruto? He'll try it on Sakura and I'm a big Naruto Hinata fan. Sasuke? He'll be OOC too so Nah. Kiba? Could work but again I'm a Naruto Hinata fan so no. Shino? Uh…I don't think so. Shikamaru? Hey that could work but then it might be 'too' troublesome of him to follow that plus he's a genius. Lee? On Sakura…but I don't like the idea. So I decided to go with Neji Tenten because one it could work and two they're my favorite pairing! Oh this is a dedication to my other reviewers' Thank you for reviewing! Oh R+R on this too: XD


	2. Sasuke's Yell

Dedication: Brian and Tenten4Neji because they suggested this

Story Status: Chapter Two

Pairing: Sasuke/Sakura

Summary: Sasuke picked up a book he found on the ground. Will he try it out?

**How to kiss a Girl 101**

"Since I have no use for this," said Neji with a grin. He drops the book on the floor and pats his hands

"I'm going to throw it away," With that Neji left with the same grin plastered on his face

'_But maybe I should purchase the second book…' _he thought but then quickly discard it_ 'Nah…'_

The book, how to kiss a girl 101, was on the ground but not on any ground. It was on the ground of the sidewalk where Uchiha Sasuke lived! So when the Uchiha prodigy walked out of his humble home, he can't help but noticed the small book on the ground. His reaction was the same as Neji's

"How to kiss a Girl 101?" He made a face and decided to throw it away but then he noticed the tag on the top left of the book

"Hinata, remember to give it back to me. Arigato!" he said with a plain tone and his eyes cast down on the author who had wrote that

'Sakura huh…' He made another face but it was a pleasant one. So Sasuke shrugged and decided it to read the first page. After all it's just a book right? 

_Do you want to get the girl of your dreams? Or you just plain scared to get her? Hahaha…what kind of weakling are you? Have you even kissed a girl? Pathetic! Well do not fret since this guide will help you get the girl you want!_

He rolled his onyx eyes and was thinking of discarding the book

'_This is just plain pointless,'_ Sasuke put the book in his pocket and walked around. His eyes cast around everywhere but then he saw a familiar pink haired girl surrounded with her 'fan boys' His eyes twitch

"Nande yo?" he whispered but then he shrugged thinking he wouldn't care. The book suddenly dropped down and it opened up in the middle (After about purchasing the second book. I guess Neji didn't look further haha!)

_You already kissed her and now she's your girlfriend! Told you this guide would work! Now are you jealous of the guys around her? Well then all you have to do is push those guys around and swing your arms around her waist and say "Yo! She's my girl!" and forcefully kiss her right there! Remember, this guide is not responsible for any bitch slaps, guys going into a tantrum, or any other necessary pain!_

His eyes twitch once more when he read it so he tried to ignore what he just read. Sasuke took his book and put it in his pocket once more but then he noticed Sakura with her fan boys again. Something stirred in Sasuke but he wasn't sure what it was. Maybe it's the look in Sakura's face…or maybe it's just that damn book!

'Stupid book! Why did I put it in my pocket in the first place?' he scold to himself 

He tried (keyword: tried) to ignore Sakura when he past her but that feeling stirred in him again. His eyes twitch as he saw the boys declaring their love to Sakura. Sasuke couldn't take it anymore. He ran back in the middle of the crowd in front of Sakura and glaring menacingly at them

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura said shockingly. The guys were glaring at him but he felt no faze and he wrapped Sakura's waist with his arms. All of them were shock! It was like Naruto quits eating Ramen! Hinata stopped liking Naruto and have an attraction towards Shikamaru! It was like Shikamaru stop looking at clouds and start dating girls! All in all, it was like impossible!

"Yo! She's my girl!" He hissed but then twitch. Oh shit. He didn't just do that did he? And that's not the most shocking part. Right there…he just kissed her in front of more than half the Konoha boys in the village. For a minute, all guys departed because they can't compete with an Uchiha. Now…even though everyone was gone, Sasuke can't stop kissing! So Sakura (SAKURA!) stopped the kiss and blinked. Sasuke twitched.

He couldn't face Sakura so he turned around and ran away. Sakura had a full-blown blush on her face as she stared at Sasuke's disappearance.

'_Damn book,'_ he cursed to himself. But when he reached up to touch his hot cheeks, he slowly changed his mind

'_But then again, it is good for something,'_ With a smirk, he threw the book on the ground not knowing who else will pick it up. He placed his hands in his pocket and walked away from the book…

'_Besides I already got a kiss. Don't need it now,' _He thought silently with a chuckle

**End**

Very OOC isn't it? Well next is Naruto. So what will happen? Will he actually do it? Oh I will update Assassin tales…when I finish it. I'm almost done…(yeah about 2 percent done) Er…yeah don't worry about that. Well I didn't want to continue this story but my friends (you got to thank my friends for that) wanted me to add Sasuke, Naruto, and Shikamaru because it's their favorite pairings. Geez…


	3. Naruto's Smile

Dedication: Peter, xxxFireClanxxx, my reviewers

Story Status: Chapter three

Pairing: Naruto/Hinata

Summary: Hinata is holding a book in her hand. What happens when Naruto accidentally grab her book?

Note: I decided to put a little twist to it. Of course there's no Yaoi or Yuri and Naruto already likes Hinata but they didn't confess

**How to Kiss a Girl 101**

"Aa…" Hinata finally found the book her cousin threw out. She sighed as she bent down to go grab it and dust it off

"Neji-nii-san shouldn't take it away from me. It's not like I'll read it," she mutters bitterly. Hinata tucked the book in her arms and went to find Sakura to return the book but she didn't expect to land flat on her butt when she bumped into a guy in an orange jumpsuit. Papers and books were everywhere and the book flew out of Hinata's hands. She rubbed her head and she heard a familiar voice

"Aa, Hinata-chan are you all right?" She blinked and stared up to the ramen loving boy. When she realized that his face was in front of her, her face heated up and she starts to stammer

"N-n-Naruto-k-ku-kun…I…you…" Naruto raised up his right eyebrow and held out a hand to Hinata

"Daijoubu?" She slowly nodded and held Naruto's hand. Her face heated up once more and forgets about the book. She gulped when silence had entered. Naruto grinned and scratched his head

"Well, I got to give these books and papers to Tsunade-baa-chan. I'll see you later Hinata-chan," He gathered the papers and books, including the book, and ran off with a wave. Hinata can't help but dazed dreamily and wave back. For a moment, a grin plastered on her face and looked down to grab her book but…it's not there! She frantically searched the ground and retraced her steps but she couldn't find it.

_'Ok Hinata. Books don't disappear into thin air. Think. What just happened after you got the book? Grabbed it. Ran. Bumped into Narut-'_ Her eyes widen at the last thought. NARUTO HAS HER BOOK! She bit her nails (Which is a bad habit by the way) and closed her eyes

_'Don't worry, he won't know,'_ With that, she walked away with a frantic look on her face hoping that Naruto doesn't find out

* * *

"Here you go baa-chan! I got the books and papers," he said bitterly as he shoved the stuff towards Tsunade. She had a smirk on but then frowned as she saw a pink covered book labeling "How to Kiss a Girl 101" 

"This isn't mine Naruto. Are you suggesting something?" Naruto sweatdropped as he saw the evil look on the Hokage's face

"Aa…" He grabbed the book and rubbed the back of his neck

"Gomen nasai baa-chan," He smirked and ran off the office before Tsunade could throw a chair at him. He snickered as he heard the crash but then he stared at this book

_'This isn't mine either. Hmm…'_ Naruto tilted his head before he opened the book

_To get your kiss, when she faints give her a kiss right there!_

"Wha?" Naruto said confusingly

_Ah is your dream girl shy and innocent looking? Hah no fear! On the outside she's shy but in the inside she's fierce! Especially in bed, believe us!_

Suddenly Naruto dropped the book as if it was covered with bugs

"This is probably Ero-sennin book! Wait…" Now Naruto was in deep thinking. When he read that, it sort of reminded him…

"Hinata-chan! This must be her book!" His big grin plastered on again but then frown as he go down and pick up the book again

"Why does she have thi…" he trailed off then suddenly had a shock face on then ran off with the book.

* * *

"Oh please, maybe the book got stolen by someone else. Just not Naruto!" Hinata cried out still frantically moving around. Speaking of the orange boy…

"Hinata-chan!" She heard his voice and froze. Hinata shuts her eyes in fear hoping that he doesn't have the book. When she turn around with her eyes open and saw the pink book in the hands of the kyuubi container, Hinata looked in horror

_'Oh no…'_

Naruto slowly puts the book in front of her with his face down and his blond hair covering his face. He trembled

"This is yours isn't it?" Hinata grabbed it and turned around with another blushing creeping up her face. Naruto looked up to see the backside of Hinata and frowned as he crossed his arms across while tilting his head

"Hinata, I know…your secret," He started out. Hinata's blush went higher and her heart went a thumping

_'He knows!'_

"And…I know why your father keeps treating you like trash…Don't worry Hinata…I'll be there for you," he choked out (he's trying not to laugh) as he slowly approached her. It went by slow motion as Naruto wrapped his arms over Hinata. She felt like fainting at the arms of the ramen loving boy but she gulped and tried to stay on for a few more minutes

"Hinata…I know you're…affectionate towards…" He trailed off. She shuts her eyes thinking that he figured out her crush towards him

"Other girls," Her eyes shot up and pulled away from Naruto. Naruto puts his hands in defense

"Now don't worry! I will help you hook up one! I think I know this one girl who-" But he was interrupted by the Hyuuga girl

"NO! I am **not** attracted to other girls. I like you!" she blurted out. Naruto's eyes widen and stuttered,

"W-what?" Hinata blinked and suddenly puts her hand in front of her mouth

_'iie…iie! I did…didn't…NO!'_ she thought in horror

Now here's what unexpected of Naruto…she fainted. Hinata almost dropped down if not for Naruto. Naruto shook his head

"And here I was worried that she was…" He couldn't even finish his sentence but shook his head again. Then something…something clicked in his mind…

_'To get your kiss, when she faints give her a kiss right there,' _Naruto thought of the part in the pink book

Slowly, he leaned towards Hinata who looked so innocent and peaceful right now he added in his mind. But within inches, Hinata's eyes fluttered open (You know, when people faint it should be much longer but this is my story so blah) She saw the face of the Kyuubi boy and suddenly blush and shut her eyes

_'It's all a dream. Today when I open my eyes I'm in my bed…'_ She opened her eyes again and saw the blue eyes

Hinata shot up while dusting her clothes and trying not to look at Naruto in the eye. Naruto scratched on the backside of his head

"Ano…Hinata…" Fearfully, she turned and right there Naruto kissed her! When he departed, he gave his foxy grin but then…she fainted again…

Naruto sweatdropped when he grabbed her before she fell and gave his trademark smirk

"Heh. No use for this book now," He threw the pink book in the sky…

"Now…" Naruto carried Hinata in a bridal style

"Time to get you home of course. It is the duty of the future Hokage," He grinned again as he happily carried Hinata home

Meanwhile…

"Itai!" A pink book suddenly hits a young boy…but not just any boy…

It was the lazy cloud watching Chuunin…Nara Shikamaru…

**End**

Shikamaru will probably be the hardest to do since I might not get his personality in check but then again Naruto was OOC in here too. XP so R+R and about Gaara…he's going to be a big part of this story. LOL Got to thank Shinta about the fainting idea. I just wanted to do that for the fun of it. Anyways…anybody saw Shino, Kiba, and Hinata in 3 years later in the manga? Way awesome! Finally Shino got rid of his overcoat and Hinata looks hotter than ever (I like the fact she has long hair now) Anyways, review!


	4. Shika's Kisses

Dedication: Lil-donkey, Blooming Cosmos, SeaGoatsUnite, Alien26, Kookie315, KaiKaiCutie, Minoko-chan, aku no ame, hermon8, Saico, Shinta Azechi, OnEcRaZyGaL, babykitty2270, Poison Remedy-Sinful Angel, IamYerBigBro, Irsool, susakuru, Angel Yuriko, iluvsasukeandrobin, littlewolfblossom, aQuA rhapsody, liqice76, Fattyaddy-99

Story Status: Chapter four

Pairings: Shikamaru/Ino

Summary: A book hits Shikamaru. Will he read it or will it be too troublesome of him?

Note: And I do like Chouji. XP Oh go to to check out the latest manga haha

How to Kiss a Girl 101 

"Itai!" The lazy ninja rubbed his head while yawning. He was in the middle of a nap when the book hit him in the head. Shikamaru stared at it for a while but then watch the clouds as the book laid beside him

"How troublesome…" he mutters before falling asleep. Suddenly a shadow looms over Shikamaru but he didn't notice. The chubby guy besides him saw the book and blinked

"Hey Shikamaru…" the chubby guy started out as he picked up the book. Shikamaru pop his left eye open and saw Chouji, his best friend. Then he shuts his eyes again

"Nande yo?" he mutters sleepily

"Why do you have this book?" said Chouji holding it out. Shikamaru snorted and said,

"It disturbed my sleeping. So can you get it away from me?" Chouji shrugged and looked inside the book

"Hey Shikamaru," Chouji started out again

"Nani?" he said in an annoyed tone. It is his best friend but he was feeling a little bit annoyed because he didn't catch up with his sleep since he's became Chunnin.

"Did you know you can shut a girl's mouth by kissing her?" He gazed inside the book. Shikamaru mutters

"That's too troublesome," Chouji shrugged once more then dropped the book

"Ja ne," Chouji walked away from Shikamaru to not disturb of him anymore

"Ja…ne…" he mutters as he slowly drifts to sleep but his sleep will be interrupted again because a certain blond girl came over to 'talk' to Shikamaru. She eyed at the pink book and slammed the poor Ninja's head with the book

"SHIKAMARU!" She shrieked. He rubbed his head while looking at her lazily

"What is it Ino?" He yawned

"Why do you have this book?" She snarled evilly. Shikamaru turned to the book then turned to her

"It's not mine," He shrugged before lying down again. Bad mistake. She twitched and slammed it over his head one more time

"You lazy bum! If you work a little bit harder, you would be Jounin right now! I bet if Sasuke…"

'_Blah blah blah…' _That's what Shikamaru is hearing but he fell asleep again before Ino hits him again

"Baka!"

'_How ironic. I'm stupid and yet I have over 200 IQ,'_ Shikamaru rubbed his head once more. Then Ino starts to talk about him might lose his rank and what nots. He rolled his eyes and shrugged. Shikamaru remembered what Chouji said to him before so guess what he did?

He forced his lips onto hers with his eyes closed. It stayed like that for a few second but then he departed and Ino stood there in shock. He gave a silent triumph grin

'Heh, that book is right. It **does** make a girl quiet,' 

Shikamaru walked away from Ino…but he didn't expected for Ino to pin him down and crushing her lips to his. Ino stood up with a smirk

"Now who's quiet you baka? Did you know you just stole my first kiss! I can't believe…" Shit. She's talking again. He stood up and kissed her again

"Oomph," That's all Ino said. Shikamaru departed and rolled his eyes

"Can't you shut up?" Ino smirked

"I think another kiss would make me…"

Shikamaru smirked back as he wrapped his arms over Ino's waist and Ino threw the book at the sky

Meanwhile…

The book landed in front of a certain lazy white haired Ninja…Hatake Kakashi…

End 

Ok so I didn't make Shikamaru too OOC but I made Ino OOC XP yeah next is Kakashi. I would probably pair him up with Kurenai or Anko. Hehe…so let's see what happens next! Review please!


	5. Kakashi's Grin

Dedication: Victims of Hurricane Wilma and Hurricane Katrina

Story Status: Chapter five

Pairing: Kakashi/Anko

Summary: A book caught Kakashi's eye. Would he put down the Icha Icha Paradise and take a glance at this book?

Note: Many people wanted Anko/Kakashi so I decided to do Anko and Kakashi. Oh and I am making a spin off (I actually planned it too) it's called "Ten ways to kiss a guy" featuring the Kunoichis of Konoha! But got to finish this story first. Also, Shino, Kiba, Lee, and Gaara play a big part to it! (You'll see at the end…) I like Gai by the way

**How to Kiss a Girl 101**

"…" Since Kakashi is a Jounin he stopped at the book that landed in front of him even though his head is in the book of Icha Icha Paradise. For a nanosecond he took a glance down at the book then went back to his. He shrugged and went past the book but…

"Kakashi! You're reading that vile again!" said an annoying voice. Kakashi groaned knowing who it was…

"Gai!" He said without turning. The green jounin who pinged and gave a good guy pose said loudly

"You're truly my rival! You knew it was me!" Kakashi winced and kept on walking. Gai, who picked up a certain book, moved in front of Kakashi

"KAKASHI! Why not read this book? I bet it's more educational then that nasty book you always read!" Gai had a twisted look on his face as he stared at Kakashi's Icha Icha paradise but Kakashi's lazy look stared at Gai

"What did you say?" Gai screamed once more pointing at Kakashi

"OMG! You are truly my rival! I have another challenge for you! AND SINCE IT'S MY TURN!" Kakashi winced once more. He knew what will happen…

"You must read this book! AND TEST IT OUT!" Gai giggled as he held the pink book in front of him. Kakashi's lazy look appeared again and pushed the book away

"No," He simply said. Gai's eyes widen and screamed out

"THEN YOU FORFEIT! Good! Score is 200 – 199. Wait till I tell everyone the great Sharigan warrior can't do one simple thing," Gai taunted at him but Kakashi looked at him one more

"What did you say?"

"OMG!" Kakashi rolled his eyes and said,

"How about this Gai…if I do this challenge, you won't make any more challenge for a month," Gai greedily nodded and said,

"YOSH! AND IF I FAIL I'LL RUN FIVE HUNDRE-" But Kakashi took the pink book from Gai and gave Gai the Icha Icha Paradise

"You must read this too Gai. After all if I read one thing, you have to read too," Kakashi chuckled while Gai's eyes widen

"Good luck…" He left Gai and opened the pink book and skimmed it

_A girl of your dreams (and mine) should be tough, ferocious, and fierce! After all, if she's fierce on the outside then she must be on bed!_

Kakashi gave another laugh. He liked this book already. Kakashi shrugged

_'So all I got to do is kiss a girl and no more Gai,'_

His eyes wondered and saw Kurenai with Asuma. He shook his head

'_Nope Asuma will kill me that is if he could,'_ He gave another laugh

"Kakashi…" Uh oh. He knows that voice. It was the beastly sound that had always annoy him about the mask of his…

"Ah Anko-san!" Kakashi puts his hand over his head and his other hand with the pink book. She eyed at the book and puts her hands on her hips

"Why do you have that book?" Kakashi rolled his eyes and shrugged. Anko's eyes twitch and grabbed his collar

"You lazy ninja! Every time I ask a question you always roll your eyes then shrug! What the hell is that about!" She screamed. Uh oh. Anko saw the glint in his right eye. She immediately let go and tried to run away but Kakashi grabbed her arm and moved his mask crushing his lips at hers. Anko's eyes widen as his mask was pulled back up and his face was pleasant

"Did you know if a girl is fierce on the outside then she's fierce on the bed?" He had a perverted look again but Anko's eyes twitch and slammed the pink book on his head

"BAKA! BAKA! BAKA!" He ran away from her with another pleasant look on his face but Anko threw the book with all of her strength at him. Being a Jounin, he dodged it

'_Gai's right. It's best to read other stuff for one,' _Another perverted grin while Anko keep chasing him

**Meanwhile…**

"ITAI!" Apparently, Anko threw the book at Asuma who felt the book's impact. In front of him was Kurenai…

**But what about Gai…?**

"NO Izumi! Don't sleep with him!" Gai screamed as he sat down reading the book

_'Now I know why Kakashi is obsess with this…'_

**End**

Asuma is next! Yup, yup OOC indeed. I like to put Gai in because…I like Gai! Anyways review please.


	6. Asuma's Smoke

Dedication: Tori, Zack, and all my reviewers

Story status: Chapter six

Pairing: Kurenai/Asuma

Summary: Asuma got his by the book. Will he put down the cigarette and finally kiss Kurenai?

Note: I'm not doing Gai, Chouji, or Jiraiya

**Iluvsasukeandrobin**: As much as I like the two together, I must not. However in my spin off "Ten ways to Kiss a Guy" I will have Sasuke/Sakura! Plus in my upcoming story (Might upload, might not) "Best Years of our Lives: College Days"

**AQuA rHaPsOdY**:Hehe…I'm trying not to make any of them Out of Character. You'll see in this chapter…

**KaiKaiCutie:** Yup you got to love the perverted Jounin

**Jays Arrayan: **I like to do…lots of surprising stuff hehe…Gai is one of my favorite Jounins so yosh!

**Silentwater: **After this one, there's one more and I'm done! Then I can start on my spin off hehe…

**Kajiin:** Yes many people wanted Kakashi/Anko. It's more interesting that way anyways

**Clark Cradic:** Not Gai, but you'll see in this chapter. There's a lot of foreshadowing too

**Joekool: **Maybe, maybe not. But I'm not telling…

**Ghostfang: **And I'm updating. Hehe…

**QWERT: **Jiraiya and Tsunade? Well I don't know them that well except they're Sannin and thanks. I like the Naruto one too, I sort of just went along with it

**Warprince2004:** Hehe…well I'm almost done with this story.

**How to Kiss a Girl 101**

"ITAI!" He screamed as he felt his head getting hit by a book. Kurenai, who was in front of him, ran towards him as she saw the book making an impact to his head. Asuma shook his head and grinned

"I'm alright," Kurenai sighed in relief and Asuma pulled out a cig. Then Kurenai angrily hits his head

"ITAI! What was that for?" he glared dropping the unlit cig

"Mou!" She stormed off and Asuma kept his glare while pulling his cig out again. He lit it and took a huff while holding a book on his other hand

"How to kiss a girl? Geez I know how to do that," He was about to throw it away but it slipped out of his hand and opened up in the middle. Asuma stared at it before he reads the book. He took another huff then glared at the book

"It's all your fault," he hissed but he eyed at the book

If you have cigarette breath, don't even bother to get a girl. Girls hate people who smoke

Asuma kicked the book

"What do you know?" he mutters before taking another huff. Asuma glared at it again and left the area. He puts his hand in his pockets and gazed around until his eyes set down on the red eyed kunoichi

"Hmph…" She was sitting alone in the Ichiraku eating ramen. He stared at her for a few minutes but then at that time her gaze moved to Asuma's. He blushed but then flicked his head back while taking another huff. Kurenai glared at him then went back eating

Asuma took another huff but then he saw the book in front of him again. Another glare.

"Kuso…" He threw the cig away while holding the book

"Baka book…" He hissed while opening it up again

_To ask a girl for forgiveness, grab some roses, kneel on one leg, and apologize! I'm sure she'll kiss you! If not then just buy her some expensive crap but it's worth it!_

"Hmm…interesting…" he muttered then shrugged while holding the book as he went to go buys some roses. Asuma rolled his eyes and paid the Yamanaka mistress some money

"Where's Ino-san?" Asuma said. Ino's Okaasan's smile grew big and whispers into his ears. His eyes went big and dashed out of the shop

"I don't need _that_ much information about Ino and Shikamaru. Mou…" His hand is on his temple while holding the book and roses on one hand. He went back to the Ichiraku stand and still saw Kurenai eating alone. Asuma smiled and walked smoothly towards her

"A-Asuma?" She said startled as she saw the roses.

"Forgive me," He said politely. Kurenai gave him a heart-warming smile and hugged him.

"So you'll quit smoking?" Her smile went big but he frowned

"What are you talking about girl? I am **not** quitting smoking," She twitched and grab the roses and smacked him on his head but Asuma grabbed her wrist before she can move. Kurenai glared at him and said,

"Let me go Asuma-san," Asuma glared back, which made her startled, and said,

"I am who I am. You cannot change a person. It's who they are," Kurenai's gaze drops down and hugs him once more

"Gomen nasai," Asuma sighs and said,

"But…if it makes you happy, I'm not going to smoke on our dates," He rolled his eyes as she hugged him tightly once more. Kurenai pecked him on the lips and said,

"Arigato Asuma-san," She dashed off while Asuma stared at her with a smile on his face

"Guess you were wrong, book. I can get a girl," He smirked as he left the book on the stands of the Ichiraku. Unknowingly…a certain Chunnin teacher came on by at the seat of where the book was…

"Welcome Iruka-san!" Teuchi said happily

**End**

If no one knows who's Teuchi. That would be Ayame's father but I don't know who to pair up Iruka with. Maybe Shizune…or maybe Shizune and Ayame! That would be funny to see! Oh and the next chapter would be the final chapter!


	7. Iruka's Headache

Dedication: Red Fox, KaiKaiCutie, crasiness, heffer123, babykitty2270, Miyuki Kinomoto, aQuA rHaPsOdY, Kaikira Matsunaga, and warprince2000

Story status: Chapter Seven

Pairing: Shizune/Iruka/Ayame

Summary: Iruka found a book. What happens when two girls fight for him?

**How to Kiss a Girl 101**

"Welcome Iruka-san!" Teuchi said happily as Iruka Umino waltz in with a frustrated face and his hands almost pulling his hair out. He sat down next to the book and rose up his fingers while closing his eyes and said,

"Give me the usual Teuchi-kun," Teuchi smiled and started working on Iruka's beef ramen. Teuchi's daughter, Ayame, blinked and leaned in front of the counter and tilted her cute face

"What's wrong Iruka-san?" she said with a small frown. She's been admiring from him from afar and always sees her best customer (Naruto) with him

"Konohamaru sent in the rats during class time and everyone freaked out. I swear, he's becoming like Naruto every day," He huffed out. Ayame's frown went to a small smile. Naruto wasn't a bad kid…at times.

"Ah well, we'll give you an extra beef ramen free of charge!" she said happily while clapped her hands as she went for to work for the ramen. Iruka's face brightens and gave his small smile

"Arigato Ayame-chan," She almost fainted when he said her name but Ayame held on a little longer and worked on his beef ramen.

But unluckily for her, a jounin came in and not any normal Jounin. It was the apprentice of Tsunade-sama, Shizune. She came in with the same frustrated face Iruka had and ordered what Iruka had ordered. Teuchi nodded as he worked on the two beef ramen

"Aa Shizune-san!" Iruka said happily. Shizune opened her eyes and saw the chunnin teacher

"Iruka-san, I didn't know you were here," She smiles and gave a little nod. Shizune saw a small pink book next to Iruka and pointed to him

"Is that yours?" Iruka looked at what she was pointing and it was a small pink book almost in perfect condition titled 'How to Kiss a Girl 101' by Shira Leki

He frowned and took a little look in the book

_Eh? You got two girls fighting for you? Well in our opinion we should just kick back and watch, we **love** a catfight. Rowrr! But if you don't want to (You're not a guy at all!) then to stop is to compliment them both and kiss them at the same time_

"Nope that's not mine but it's a nice book isn't it?" He blushed which was bad timing because Ayame went in with his beef ramen and saw the two ninjas looking at each other. She frowns and puts the ramen in front of Iruka. He puts down the book and smiled at her

"Here you go Iruka-san!" she said happily but there was a hint of sadness in it. Her father stares at her confusingly and told her daughter to give the ramen to the other girl. She nods slowly but grinned wildly. Ayame puts something in Shizune's food and gave it to her

"Here you go…" she said quietly. Shizune frowns and stares at her ramen. It was red and I mean bright red

"I…ordered beef ramen," Shizune said confusingly. Ayame's eyebrow went up and stared at both of them

"There's nothing wrong with it," she said nonchalantly. Shizune's frown grew bigger and was about to order her to take it back but Iruka interrupted her before she could

"Ah we should eat neh Shizune? Ayame worked hard for it," he said with a smile. Shizune twitched and gave a forced grin

"Right," They both grabbed chopsticks and both said,

"Itadakimasu," and broke the chopstick and they both reached for the noodles. Shizune twitched once more and Iruka was smiling at her. Damn. She took a bite and immediately asked for water. Ayame snickered and Iruka stared at both of them confusingly

"TEME!" Shizune hissed as she finally got a drink. Ayame put on an innocent face and puts her hands in defense

"Nande yo? I didn't do anything," She said innocently. Shizune stepped up on the counter and pointed her fingers at her

"You wanted to kill me don't you?"

"You want Iruka-san for yourself?" she retorted. Shizune gasped and said,

"I do **not!** You're such a-"

"Well you're a-"

As the two girls bicker senselessly, Iruka felt a headache coming up and decided to stop them

"ladies…" but they wouldn't stop. They kept on bickering and things got worse when Shizune was about to use her ninja skills on Ayame

"Shizune! Ayame!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. The two girls glare at him and screamed,

"Stay out of this!" Iruka twitched and felt a chill. Something was about to go wrong. Horribly wrong…

"Come on Ayame…" Teuchi tried to reasonably talk to his daughter but…

"Oh no! Iruka-san!" A pile of** hot** ramen flew on top of Iruka. The two girls gasped in horror and came rushing to him

"Hot…" he choked and Ayame and Shizune immediately took the ramen bowl out of his head

"Daidouji?" Ayame said weakly. Iruka's eyes were bloodshot red and whispered to both of them

"You are both great girls but I will and always will be a bachelor," Shizune and Ayame's head droops down and Iruka sighed. He was going to regret this but…

He swoops down to kiss Shizune's face first then Ayame. The two girl brightly turned red and stuttered simultaneously

"Ah…we…." Iruka puts his money down on the counter and left angrily the ramen stand. Teuchi, Shizune, and Ayame were all quiet but then Shizune spoke up

"He kissed me first you know," Ayame twitched and glared at her

"Oh what do you know?" And the bickering went on…

Teuchi slapped his forehead knowing this will probably go on all night…

**And what happened to the book?**

Iruka grabbed the book on the way out and thought if this hadn't came in the store he wouldn't know how to get the girls quiet. He gave a small smile and saw Shino, Kiba, Gaara, and Lee around the corner. Iruka gave the book to them

"Here you might need it someday," he said happily as Shino pushed back his dark glasses, Kiba and Lee were prancing around, and Gaara stood there. Iruka left and still felt the pain shot in his head

"Looks like we got the book back," Shino said quietly. Kiba grinned and Lee puts up his nice guy pose 

"Yatta! Our book! I thought Sakura-san had lost it!" Kiba said with a smile while Akamaru barked happily

"We should show this book to our teammates someday!" said Lee holding the book in front of Gaara

Gaara's arms were crossed and had a small smile

"I think they already seen it…"

**End**

Yes many questions are unanswered like where was Kankurou and Temari? And other stuff…well I meant to put this on the book

"How to kiss a Girl 101"

By Shira Leki

If you guys didn't get it…

**Shi**no

Gaa**ra**

**Le**e

**Ki**ba

So yeah they were creators of the book. Weird ending neh? Anyways and thus that concluded the final chapter of…

**How to Kiss a Girl 101**

Whoo I'm done! Read and review xP


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